I’m not sure alcohol is it, but I’m willing to bet some substance or other was a factor in the case of Bill Kachle here.
Bill Kachle, 68, was arrested last month after Jared Tyng, a United States Park Police officer, responded to a complaint about a “disorderly male subject” along the Mount Vernon Trail in northern Virginia.
Two female witnesses pointed Tyng in the direction of Kachle, a Washington, D.C. resident who was “holding a yoga pose” nearby. The women said that they were walking along a bike trail when Kachle–who was waving his arms and “shouting odd statements”–dropped his pants and began masturbating.
“Thereafter, the subject then picked up a dead animal, ran into the northbound lanes of travel on the George Washington Memorial Parkway and threw the dead animal at a passing car,” according to a U.S. District Court complaint.
What those odd statements were and what the dead animal was remain mysteries, but what we do know is what you’re supposed to do after you’ve yelled, beaten off in a park and thrown dead things at vehicles. The answer, of course, is go back to your spot on the trail, point at your witnesses and start going to town on yourself again.
Kachle was arrested and charged with obscenity and disorderly conduct.