Other than the running and the paperwork, this sounds like a pretty easy night on the job.
Officers responded to a Walmart in Knoxville around 9 p.m. Saturday and found Donald Kirkland in possession of stolen items, the report stated.
Police said Kirkland ran from the officers but was eventually taken into custody.
Kirkland told the officers he had stolen three TVs, a karaoke machine and camping equipment from the retail store and was selling the items in the parking lot, according to the report.
No, you’re not wrong. He really did mean the Walmart parking lot. Yes, the same one.
What I want to know is whether he sold anything before the cops shut him down. If that Walmart is anything like the one near our house, there’s a decent chance he might have. Sure you know something illegal is probably going on, but you’re just so happy that there’s actually someone around to help you find items and get them paid for in a reasonable amount of time that you’re willing to overlook it.
Hahahaha that song.
I thought this might be a good excuse to put it back in your head for a while.