I think this might be one of the more straightforward, honest explanations for rubbing one or two or three out in your local Walmart I’ve seen.
A Walmart worker told cops that a female customer reported that Bryant was acting “weird” in the men’s department. When the employee went to investigate, she noticed that Bryant “had his penis out of his pants and was rubbing it.” The worker added that Bryant would cover himself when someone moved toward him in the aisle, but would resume “the activity when he thought no one was watching him.”
Two other Walmart workers told police that they also witnessed Bryant pleasuring himself. One worker said that she “peaked through a jeans shelf and noticed him pull out his penis and begin to stroke it.”
Police, who were not fooled by the jacket he placed in front of himself as they approached, arrested and charged Jeremy Percival Bryant with indecent exposure. During questioning, he told officers that the reason he did what he did is that he “has a problem with sticking his hands in his pants.”
Yup.
Do you remember the Blink 182 album Take off your pants and Jacket? That.
Hahaha. I do remember it. It was the one with all those awesome bonus tracks, I believe.
And nice play on words, of course.
We, … Never has one word struck such fear into me as when you and J started strumming the guitar and going “We…” All I thought was “Oh good god no, don’t sing the song in front of mom and dad!”
Which was exactly why we did it, of course. Worked out as well or better than we imagined it, too.
Everybody sing along!
Your results may vary, but when I clicked it this video was preceded by a 1 minute NDP campaign ad. That was funny.
I got a liberal ad.
Why are there no Conservative ones? They’ve been screwing the pooch for the last 9 years.
I was trying to form that thought, and couldn’t get there.