If There’s Such A Thing As A Factual Prediction, This Is It

Last Updated on: 30th June 2016, 08:32 am

Ok, time to throw down my prediction for tonight’s big Canada vs. USA hockey game.

I’m not going to spend a whole lot of time analyzing line combinations and statistics and all that stuff, it’s been done to death by folks much more qualified than I. I’m simply going to use a little deductive reasoning to reach a sensible conclusion. Observe:

• Ron Wilson is coaching Team USA.
• Brian Burke is the General Manager of Team USA.
• These 2 men currently hold the same positions with the Toronto Maple Leafs of the National Hockey League.
• I have had bowel movements with better records than this year’s Toronto Maple Leafs.

Therefore…

• Team USA will go as the Leafs go, giving up the first goal or possibly 2, making things interesting, giving up a huge lead, almost come back and perhaps even tie the game before ultimately shitting the bed…in overtime.

I’m not betting the farm on OT, but everything else you can take to the bank.

Now if only somebody would send me a cheque like the one’s I’m sure Bob McKenzie is getting…