I’m Suddenly Not Very Thirsty

I just got what should have been a very tempting marketing email. “Splash into our summer cocktail menu,” it offered. It also used this emoji. 💦 “What,” you might be asking yourself at this moment, “is the problem there? I assume there’s a problem since you said “should have been tempting”.” The problem, my curious …

Probably Our Next Music Playing Kid

I apologize for this being a TikTok video since their screen reader accessibility is butt, but once I got it to play I felt like sharing it since it’s cute and kind of fits one of our ongoing themes. @babylaughh #baby #cute #foryou #foryoupage ♬ original sound – babylaugh Here’s a description of what’s going …

I Swear I Thought It Was A Plant-Based Nose

I just heard Carin mention Beyond Meat during a phone call and it reminded me that for some reason I never got around to letting you all know that a couple of years ago the company’s chief operating officer tried to bite a guy’s nose off during a road rage incident. I apologize for my …

I Want To Get Convicted Again

Point: Someone with 11 felonies on his record should know how to commit a proper robbery by now. Counterpoint: You don’t end up with 11 felonies on your record by being good at crime. You would not, for instance, threaten a clerk who just caught you trying to shoplift, go outside, put on a hood …

Dog, God, Everybody Got A Little That Day

Lots going on here. Or maybe it’s just your average Florida Sunday. According to Mason’s arrest affidavit, he knew the owner of the dog and was taking the goldendoodle out for a walk in the apartment complex. Then, he started having sex with the dog in front of witnesses, including adults and a juvenile who …

This Joke Kills Every Time

Remember the time when that gun shop owner shot his buddy’s face off for giggles? This is that, but with cops. I guess all that highly trained to make good, split second decisions stuff doesn’t apply when you’re off duty. A 23-year-old Florida sheriff’s deputy was fatally shot by his fellow deputy roommate over the …

You’d Better Not Make Him Number Forty-Seven

And now, it’s time for Carin and Steve have mind beams part…um…I suppose “FORTY-FIVE!” I was just out in the kitchen washing dishes and listening to a podcast completely unrelated to music or politics or anything that would make me think about Donald Trump or Randy Rainbow when I suddenly thought to myself, I wonder …