I woke up with this in my head today. I don’t know why. But I suppose if you’ve got to have a random tune in your head you could do a whole lot worse than this one. Man, what a banger. A banger that I just realized is like 28 years old. Jesus. Give me …
Author Archives: Steve Wettlaufer
This Means War…Or Something
Yes, Christmas is over. but I just saw…whatever the fuck this is and I just had to share it. At the lighting of the new Christmas tree, Fox News contributor Rev. Jacques DeGraff declares: "I’m here because these colors do not run. 80 years ago this week, they tried to extinguish the darkness in a …
Anyone Who Cares What Colour Your Texts Are Isn’t A Person You Want To Talk To Anyway, Kids
I don’t know if I’m old and tired of everyone or just have enough things to do/worry about on the average day, but this pissing match Google and Apple are having about what colour people’s messages are in group chats should win a who gives a swirling, bubbling shit award. Oh, and anyone who bullies …
Nothing’s For Sure, That’s For Sure
Ontario’s top doctor says he ‘can’t guarantee’ that businesses will reopen on Jan. 26 Some days I wonder if anyone has learned a thing during the nearly two damn years that we’ve been dealing with COVID. I know we all want to see it over with for a lot of reasons, but by now we …
Would You Like Freeze With That?
‘Bundle up’: Restaurants reopen patios due to restrictions on indoor dining This is an article from this month. This month is January, in case you’re reading this later. I understand that businesses are having to do what they have to do to keep going, but what I don’t get is how and why in the …
You Need What Now? Why?
So. Have any of you noticed that sometimes when people talk about PPE it sounds like they’re saying peepee? And if you have, are you like me and giggle whenever you hear that they want to provide everyone with all the peepee they need? How much peepee does someone really need, anyway? Is there a …
Whole Lotta Folsom
I have nothing to say, I just thought you all might want to hear this thing that Spotify served up for me just now. Yes, that is indeed Folsom Prison Blues being sung to the riff from Whole Lotta Love. Thank you, Surreal McCoys. My day is better for having this in it.
There Are Number 1s Right In Your Phone Number. I Thought You Could Help
Today’s…uh…piss poor reason for calling 911. I’m caught in slow moving traffic and I really need to take a wiz. Please send the police. Calling 9-1-1 because you need to use the bathroom and the car ahead isn't moving fast enough, is definitely #NotFor911. 9-1-1 misuse can potentially prevent someone with a life-threatening emergency from …
Continue reading “There Are Number 1s Right In Your Phone Number. I Thought You Could Help”
Give Me Those Keys
Some days it really irritates me that guys like this get to drive and I don’t. Really, how much more dangerous could I possibly be? I’d even stick my cane out the window so I could sweep for obstacles if it would make people feel better. Halton police has charged a Waterdown man for playing …
Let Me Warm That UP For You
If nobody has, somebody needs to come up with a microwave for the car. I feel like it would save a lot of people, such as poor Zayveon Johnson here, a whole lot of trouble. It might give us one less gimmick to run the site on, but holy crap I think I’m fine with …