I saw the awful story of a 2-month-old baby being left car seat and all in a driveway early in the morning on the news yesterday, but it was pretty light on details since the police were still sorting things out. You watch something like that and you think Jesus, what kind of person would …
Category Archives: alcohol was a factor
They May Be Stuffing Him In Jail Soon
Stuffing is the best, but it’s not this good. The court heard that police were called to the hall at around 2.10am. Stewart said he had been “insulted” at the party by a man who made reference to the amount of stuffing he was taking from the buffet. After leaving the party, the court heard, …
You Get A Stick! And You Get A Stick!
I’ll confess. I’m not sure I know what okra is. I thought it was that chick with the talk show, but apparently that’s wrong. What I do know for certain though is that it’s important enough to beat your brother with a stick over should the no good son of a bitch ever take some …
Hare Of The Dog
I’m not even going to try dressing this introduction up, because I’d be wasting my time. Investigation after drunk man found asleep in bed at maternity ward with dead rabbit in pocket See? What could you possibly need me for? A security review has been carried out at the Midlands Regional Hospital in Portlaoise, County …
Smoked Bacon
There are a lot of common reasons for going on a bender. There are also some pretty ridiculous ones. But I’m not sure I’ve ever heard of anyone hitting both extremes simultaneously quite the way Chad Spohn did. Investigators say that Chad Spohn, 44, became highly intoxicated after drinking a bottle of Everclear, the 190-proof …
Stabby Thanksgiving
Daring to start Thanksgiving dinner before your drunk girlfriend wakes up? That’s a stabbin’. Or maybe a carvin’ would be more appropriate, given the circumstances. Smith, 45, told officers that he had argued earlier in the day with Blake, who was reportedly intoxicated and had gone upstairs to sleep. While Blake snoozed, Smith began Thanksgiving …
Cabbucket
I took a cab ride last night. I had one of those really nice, talkative drivers, so we had a pretty good conversation as we went. At one point we started talking about jobs that people think are easy but really aren’t, and driving a taxi came up. I said I’d never consider that to …
It’s A Chevy Tahoe, Not A Chevy Ho Ho
I can’t remember how long it’s been since we’ve reported on somebody gnoshing on a police car, but today we give a big ‘ol VC hello to Staci Anne Spence, who has just set the clock back to zero. The fun began when Spence, for reasons known only to her and possibly her victims, doused …
If Eating Helps You Be Less Drunk, Then Eating This Here Paperwork Is A Good Idea, Right?
Nobody wants a DWI. But if you’re gonna get one you’re gonna get one, regardless of whether or not you succeed in your efforts to ingest the printout of your breathalyzer test results. An officer arrested him after suspecting he had been drinking. The officer brought Desormes to the state police barracks, where he was …
I Said Pick Me Up At The Bar, Not The Bars!
The Van Buren County sheriff’s department says a 39-year-old woman mistook the Van Buren County jail for the bar where she was trying to pick up her boyfriend. The department says Deputy Robert Miersma spotted the Hartford-area woman backing into the jail parking lot in Paw Paw about 2 a.m. Sunday and noticed she smelled …
Continue reading “I Said Pick Me Up At The Bar, Not The Bars!”