This story of a kid’s birthday party turning into a drunken brawl causes me to ask so many questions. There’s the obvious question. What kind of idiots would break beer bottles and involve themselves in a massive 75-person brawl in front of 30 children? Not only are you setting a horrible example, but you’re endangering …
Category Archives: alcohol was a factor
Open The Door, Get On The Floor, Everybody…Hump The Dinosaur?
Ooo! A humping! We haven’t had one of these in a while. All we know for sure is that somebody flashed some girls in a playground, and then humped a dinosaur-shaped piece of playground equipment. Police think that a drunken fellow by the name of Guadelupe Paramo-Almanza was the one who did it, but they’re …
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Cutting Remarks Should Not Lead To Being Cut
Is it me, or are people’s tempers getting shorter and shorter? I mean, we have the whole food feuds tag full of people snapping over various food items not being available. Now, we know that you shouldn’t tell Dallas Amber Smith that her feet smell, or she might stab you in the back. Seriously. It …
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What About The Woman On The Couch? Oh. She’s Part Of The Furniture
Eeewww. I don’t know how good I’d feel if I was one of the people viewing a house in Notting Hill where it was discovered that the owner of the house was lying dead on the couch while the tour was going on. At first the agent thought the lady was just sleeping, so saved …
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Three Strikes You’re Off To Jail
Tommy Ryser must have gone to the Leonard Scott and Erik Salmons school of don’t stop until you’re completely screwed. Why? Because he committed 3 DUI’s on the same night, and he got caught when he came back to collect the evidence of his first two. It started when he crashed his truck into a …
Take Her Directly To Jill
Here’s a little tip for all the Sheryl A. Urzedowskis out there. When you’re asked to do a field sobriety test, it’s not a fashion show. Just walk the line once. Walking it with hands on hips 3 times is not necessary. Also not necessary is requesting to perform a gymnastics routine, although that would …
Eight Drunks In The Car, And The Officer Said, "Pull Over!"
The first entry in this little news briefs thingy is what I’m interested in. I’ll try to tell the story as best I can without breaking out into barrages of “you idiots!” Eight numbskulls didn’t want to pay a cab fare. Many of them had been sucking back the booze. Luckily, the driver *was* sober. …
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Taxi To Jail
I think Jennifer Gille should stay away from the booze and the drugs. She does stuff that makes no sense. She got a cab, and asked to go to a residence in the city, but would not get out when they got there. Then, inexplicably, she demanded to go to Michigan and started taking off …
He Wanted To Make Another Impact And Create More Victims
It’s people like Timothy Coughlin who make me think we need a “you’re a dick” tag. He was convicted of DWI, and drove drunk to something to do with his DWI conviction. Ok, we’ve heard that before. But what he drove drunk to was a victim impact panel. He was trying to register, but a …
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Portrait Of A Drunken Ex-Friend
I wouldn’t want to be James Haggerty right now. He’s being blamed for losing a $1.35 million painting, and he’s being sude. Hell, I might want to have a drink or 6, even if a drink or 6 was what got me into this mess. But I also wouldn’t want to be Kristyn Trudgeon or …