The Eyebrow’s Connected To The Breast Bone And Other Lessons From Friendly Dr. Newman

Since I posted last, I did some more looking around to see if there was anything else important about Dr. David Newman that might be worth including. I’d have done that during the writing process like I generally do, but Firefox was bound and determined that it was going to crash and try to take …

Let Me Give You A Shot For That

And now, the story of a woman with an injured right arm and her hospital run-in with New York emergency room doctor David Newman, who various authorities are alleging had no such trouble with his. The woman claims she removed her shirt and bra, but kept her pants on. The woman was still dressed in …

For The Second Time Today, Don’t Dink And Drive

Thankfully nobody died this time. A Georgia motorist was masturbating when he plowed his vehicle into a van that had stopped at an intersection, police report. According to cops, Donald Marvin Johnson, 63, was “physically distracted” while driving his Saturn Ion Monday morning in Martinez, an Augusta suburb. Johnson was “following too closely” when he …

There’s Been A Misunderstanding. I Was Talking About Hot Dogs And Coconuts

A company that provides online sign language interpreting services is suing a 51-year-old man for an unspecified amount in damages because, they say, he massively abused both their service and himself throughout 2015. They accuse David Marcano of making 4,646 calls to their video chat even though he isn’t deaf, but the bigger issue seems …

What Did You Say Your Name Was? Hardon?

Sometimes this stuff is way too easy. According to a SLED affidavit dated Feb. 18, Officer Marshall Lee Hardin, II was in his parked patrol car at Woodward Park on Ballpark Road back on Dec. 13, 2015. Hardin, the affidavit continues, was watching pornography on his personal phone when he performed a sex act on himself …

Next Time I Won’t Wear Pants, Officer

I think this might be one of the more straightforward, honest explanations for rubbing one or two or three out in your local Walmart I’ve seen. A Walmart worker told cops that a female customer reported that Bryant was acting “weird” in the men’s department. When the employee went to investigate, she noticed that Bryant …