>Back Off! Make Your Own Sandwich!

>Ooo! More food-related fightin’. Now we have Lyndel Toppin, whose name is dangerously close to “topping”, who makes me wonder if he was the result of breeding between a human and a pit bull. Because his fiance didn’t put the cheese on his meatball sandwich just right, he not only slashed her finger causing a …

>This Blood’s For You, For Clocking Off The Job And Not Buying Something I Like, You No Good Sons Of…

>Amilcar H. Guerra, 50, is facing charges of aggravated battery after throwing punches at and then stabbing the 3 people he was drinking beer with in a mobile home. Yes, I’m shocked too. So why did he do this, you ask. Seems hewasn’t a fan of the brand of beer they had purchased for the …

Might As Well Revise the "Might As Well Go For A soda" Lyrics

More fights over food, only this time it was something to drink. Specifically, two brothers fought over a coke. The funniest part is the guy who was originally angry about the drinking of the coke ended up shot dead by the other guy. It’s a coke, guys. Now you have one less family member. Just …

He’ll Get 9 Lives For This

Here comes another one of those food fight stories. This one started because of animal food, but I figure that counts. Ian D. Johnson, 33, has appeared in court on a charge of felony assault witha weapon after an argument with his father about contributing to the household turned into an argument over a 60-cent …

C Is For Cookie. C Is Also For Controller And Clink

Ok, it’s food fisticuffs time again. Daniel Alvarez, 21, is sitting in jail and looking at up to 20 years there after a fight with his girlfriend over some Girl Scout cookies. According toreports,Christina Alvarado told police that she woke Alvarez in the early hours of the morning when she discovered that he had eaten …

He thought He’d Drop In For Lunch

Hmmm. Does this belong in the food-related crimes files? Well I guess it does, but it belongs in a few categories. Alex Cupczinski had a good thing goin’ on. He would break into people’s vacation homes, eat and drink from their fridges and cupboards, take some electronics, and even wear their clothes. Then, he screwed …