I have to wonder. Did Jona Zeigler go to the LaKeitha Watson-Atkinson getaway driving school? If she did, she learned quite well. Police decided to have a chat with her because she had warrants. She wasn’t the biggest fan of that, so she drove away, then got out of her car to run. The only …
Category Archives: master criminals
Fountain Of Stupid
We now have a name for the texting chick who fell into the fountain. It’s Cathy A. Cruz Marrero, and she’s suing the mall security for releasing her video to YouTube. The funny part is she would have been completely unidentifiable from the video, but she started demanding apologies and suing over it. But she …
Identity Crisis
What’s with all these people giving bad false names? First up, we have Jonothan Ray Gonsalez, who used the name Timothy Michael Koop Jr instead of his own. The problem was that man was wanted too. I guess he only had one warrant, whereas Gonsalez had 3, but still, one warrant will take you to …
What Would You Like On That, Sir? I’ll Have Some Peppers And Some Forgery Charges.
Sometimes that whole if at first you don’t succeed, try, try again thing isn’t the best strategy for living your life. It most definitely wasn’t in the case ofWilliam Peppers,who was bound and determined that no matter what, he was going to get himself some Edwardo’s pizza. He almost did, aside from the part where …
The Point Of Creating A Diversion Is To Divert Attention.
Here’s a tip. If trying to divert attention away from you as you run from the scene of a robbery by calling 911 and reporting a carjacking, don’t describe your own getaway vehicle as the one being carjacked. They’ll probably catch you real fast, and then it’ll all be over.
Planted In Jail
Look, Enson M. Ibanez, you’re an idiot. You were given a chance to save yourself. If you returned the planter you were in the middle of stealing, you would face no charges. Your response? ‘No. It’s too heavy.’ So, your list of charges is disorderly conduct, malicious destruction, and larceny. And all that could have …
Stop, Or I’ll Mute
Wow. I’ve seen a lot more robberies lately where the robber is just not cut out for this. A man came into a grocery store, pointted a gun and said this was a robbery. The owner of the store pointed a remote control at him and told him to leave, and he did! He ran …
The Books Got In The Way Of Getting A Good Education
I think this guy had better head back to school. Even though he was very proud of getting his GED, he hadn’t learned yet that it is never a good plan to hang the GED certificate above his meth-cooking rig. It’s also not good, when you’re discovered by cops, to run into the woods with …
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Was He Trying To Apologize?
Hey Scott Johnson. For the love of Pete, if you’ve just tried and failed to rob a liquor store the night before, do not go back there to buy booze while wearing the same clothes, unless you want to get caught. You will, and you did.
I Suspect He Won’t Be Just A Suspect For Long
If you’re on surveillance footage robbing a store while your partner shoots the clerk dead, it’s probably not a good idea to come back to the store and tell a TV reporter how mad you are for being branded a suspect. You might as well just turn yourself in, because if the reporter’s any good, …
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