Hey there, gang of four bank robbers. It’s good to leave the bank with the money, but your keys also need to come out of the bank with you. If not, well, it’ll be a short trip to jail.
Category Archives: master criminals
The Boy Who Cried Bomb
Hey there James Ronald Condren. If you’re going to say that your brother made all the false bomb threats for which you’re being tried, it’s probably not a good idea to make another false bomb threat right there.
Dork To Door
I have to tell a little story. I wonder if the guy in the story happens to be Anthony Korazco and since this story happened, he had since relocated to Brownsville, Texas. One night, Steve came down to meet a friend of ours outside the apartment building. While waiting for the cab, a guy came …
All My Shootings Be Drive-Bys…On Myself
Here’s a hot tip for all of the aspiring drive-by shooters in the crowd.Remember to roll the window down first. Andrew J. Burwitz, 20, of Appleton, Wis., allegedly tried to do a drive-by shooting at the home of his ex-girlfriend’s family and another random house. Police found him because he failed to roll down his …
Oxygen In The Tank, Money Out Of The Bank
I’m not sure if this guy is the same guy we talked about before, but if he is, he’s now robbed four banks…while on oxygen…and just walked out with the money. At least in the last case, he was armed, so I understand why the teller may have given him what he asked for. Man, …
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Grand Theft Fail Auto
I think Gary E. Ensor should take a lesson from Jason Durant and Claude King and learn that just like them, he’s not meant for a life of crime. For some reason, his truck got stuck on some tracks and a train was coming. So he got out of his truck and left it to …
You’d Think This Would Be Just The Sort Of Outside The Bun Thinking A Manager Would Look For
My friend, I’m afraid you’ve gone and done it backwards. The way it’s supposed to go is ask for a job application, then pull a gun, rob the place and leave, notpull a gun on a clerk, order him to the floor, go talk to the manager about a job then leave with no money …
Shitty Robbery Plans
Hey there copper wire-stealing dude. It’s a good idea to check a place where you’re going to steal copper wire to see if there are cameras. What is a bad idea is trying to take a crap in a barrel of grease nearby. There were cameras, you tipped over the barrel, and your whole escapade …
Pothead
God it would be funny to watch this go down. A police officer walked into a convenience store and saw a guy walking away from the washroom, peering into his hat. When the guy looked up, there was a bag of marijuana stuck to his forehead. The cop walked up to him, pulled the bag …
Bangk Machine
The other day, Steve mentioned that South African bank machines were pepper spraying folks who try to tamper with them. Now I read that the cash boxes in Belgian bank machines will implode if forced open. Wacky stuff. Too bad that little nugget of info wasn’t told to the pair of gangsters who tried to …