Hungry Like The Statue

The spelling is off, but it’s too close not to include in the aptly named criminal file. Two men have been arrested and face several charges each in connection with the thefts of multiple wolf statues that are part of a public art display in the town of Abingdon, Virginia. They are brothersBascome and Ernie …

They’ll See Right Through Your Thin Disguise Alright

Next time you want to rob a place, don’t do what Michael Clough did. If you are using a veil as a disguise, make sure it’s not see-through, and don’t live really close to the place you robbed. It would also be good if you’re not well-known to police, so when they see through your …

Family Gatherings Are Going To Be Awkward Now…

Jason Zacchi had to be on something if he thought robbing the Wendy’s where his mom worked would be a good plan. Not only did mommy dearest recognize him, and his girlfriend who was an ex employee, but where did they go after the robbery? Back to his house…which he shared with his mom. So, …

Oh Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree, How Beautiful Your…Handlebars?

Not that any of you are going to want to do this, but just in case… If you’re planning on stealing a Christmas tree, under no circumstances should you: Be drunk at the time. Be riding a bicycle that you built a motor for but forgot to put lights on. Try to balance the tree …

Dork To Door

I have to tell a little story. I wonder if the guy in the story happens to be Anthony Korazco and since this story happened, he had since relocated to Brownsville, Texas. One night, Steve came down to meet a friend of ours outside the apartment building. While waiting for the cab, a guy came …

All My Shootings Be Drive-Bys…On Myself

Here’s a hot tip for all of the aspiring drive-by shooters in the crowd.Remember to roll the window down first. Andrew J. Burwitz, 20, of Appleton, Wis., allegedly tried to do a drive-by shooting at the home of his ex-girlfriend’s family and another random house. Police found him because he failed to roll down his …

Oxygen In The Tank, Money Out Of The Bank

I’m not sure if this guy is the same guy we talked about before, but if he is, he’s now robbed four banks…while on oxygen…and just walked out with the money. At least in the last case, he was armed, so I understand why the teller may have given him what he asked for. Man, …