I Guess It Beats Repeatedly Asking "Do You Love Me?"

Oh lord. Now we have a mobile service in Korea grading a caller’s sincerity level. They’ll even send the person paying for the service an analysis of the conversation, broken down into affection, surprise, concentration and honesty. Part of me wants to see how well this works, and part of me wonders how many Korean …

Oh Wear the Damn Turbin! See If I Care!

To all Sikhs who want to ride a motorcycle, but don’t want to wear a helmet because it violates your religious rights, I have one question. Will you be able to remember your religious teachings if your brains are turned to soup in a motorcycle accident while you wear your turbin and not your helmet? …

Plop, Plop, Fizz, Fizz, Oh, What Intense Pain It Is

Hey there Chrystal Kolinski! Explain something to me. Please explain this, because I cannot wrap my head around it. If you met a random man in an adult video store, and you became friends with him, and he kept asking you to drink some random fluid and capture you on film doing it, wouldn’t you …

Something Tells Me this Death-Defying Stunt Won’t Defy Death Too Much Longer

Hmmm. Is it a good idea to force a circus act to continue for another year just because the contract says so, when it involves one person firing a crossbow at another’s head if the shootee is the shooter’s recently estranged husband? I know the show must go on, but isn’t this a little too …

Is The Nimrod A Thing Or A Person?

Note to self. If I ever end up on an oil rig near Scotland, I should never tell anyone about my wacky dreams. They might freak out and evacuate the place. That’s what happened when one woman had a dream about a bomb being on the platform. They went nuts, called in helicopters, reconnaissance crafts, …