Well, Lawyers Do Like To Spew It…

I should be able to take this lawsuit seriously. I mean, I can’t imagine finding out that, while I was under the knife, my doctor somehow stapled my butt shut. But I can’t. Why? Because the guy this happened to is represented by a lawyer named Emily Malarkey. by the sounds of it, she should …

Urethra! We’ve Found It!

This one definitely belongs in the fuck fuckity fuck fuck ouch files,but what’s even more attention grabbing than a kid getting a fish stuck in his bladder is the bullshit story of how it got there. Seriously, this excuse right here is on a whole different level than anything you’ve ever heard. While he was …

Riding The Pine…No, Make That The Steel

I think it’s as hard for us to resist stories about the things people will try to fuck as it is for them to resist trying to fuck them. So in that spirit, here’s the story of a 41-year-old man from Hong Cong known only as Xing. Feeling lonely, he decided to try his luck …

A Couple More Snake Stories

Carin’s been finding a lot of stories about snakes lately, so since I never like to be outdone even though most of the time I’m too lazy to do anything about it, I figure it’s time I get in on the act. Here are a couple of snake-related mishaps I’ve come across in the last …

Would You Like Fries With That?

Gees, we’re really dealing with a classy bunch. We have the Castellanos family, who came into the Paul Bunyan restaurant, and the burger he got seemed to be underdone and cold. When he asked for things to be fixed, he says the staff were rude, but they claim they were willing to reheat the burger, …

Roscoe, No! That’s Not A Dog Bone!

This story of a dog gnawing off its owner’s toe is so great. First, there’s the idea that it happened. I guess Linda Floyd has no feeling in her feet due to diabetes, she had a hangnail, put a bandage on it, and went to sleep. AS she slept, dear little Roscoe the miniature dachshund …

Brings New Meaning To Trouser Snake, Doesn’t It?

Ouch ouch ouch ouch ouch ouch! I’m not a guy, but I can imagine getting bit on the end of your penis by a venomous snake can’t be pleasant. Oh ow ooo eee! The guy’s just lucky that somehow the snake didn’t fill him with venom, so he’s alive to remember the painful incident. I …