The good news is that a teenager thought this was a good idea. The bad news is that it’s one of the teenagers that’s old enough to vote. McDonald’s employee faked COVID-19 to get out of work, Hamilton police allege On Monday, police were tipped from Hamilton Public Health Services about an individual who allegedly …
Category Archives: that was dumb
Religious Michiganders Allowed To Give Each Other Coronavirus
Should be interesting to see how the good lord handles this one. Will he side with the people he created or with the fast moving, highly lethal virus he created? Will he split it somewhere around the middle to keep up his reputation for working in mysterious ways? To find out, keep an eye on …
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Calling 911 Will Not Get You Toilet Paper Any Faster Than The Rest Of Us Are Getting It
Of course people are calling 911 asking for toilet paper. Why wouldn’t they be? Christ, we’re so dumb sometimes. Please heed the words of the poor folks down at the Newport, Oregon police department, you fools. https://www.facebook.com/NewportPolice/posts/10151320062944944 It’s hard to believe that we even have to post this. Do not call 9-1-1 just because you …
Deadspin Is Back, At Least In Name
When last we spoke of Deadspin, dumb ass ownership was doing its level best to fuck the whole thing up. And shortly after I posted that, it succeeded. The entire editorial staff quit, and the site went silent for nearly four months. But as of a few days ago, it is no longer silent. It’s …
Stop Buying All The Damn Toilet Paper, You Animals
What is this, diarrhea Black Friday? From fist fights to stealing off carts, toilet paper frenzy hits Guelph Lineups form long before Guelph Costco opened and 1,000 packs of toilet paper were gone in 15 minutes “Good morning and don’t kill us.” And with those words, manager Armando Gumbs opened the doors of the Guelph Costco …
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Great. Now We Have To Hire Another Hit Man To Kill The Con Man Who Was Supposed To Kill That Other Con Man…
A strong urge to kill the no good SOB who conned you and your daughter out of €60,000 is certainly understandable. But that said, it’s not generally a good idea to actually go ahead and contract someone to do it so that you can get the money back by harvesting and selling his organs. I’m …
Jail Full Of Dopes
I’m ready to give a million bonus points to the first people who manage to score an interview with these two guys for their true crime podcast, because I must know what possessed them. Do they label everything? Were we to search their homes, would we find bags full of clothes? Do they take bags …
Help A Brother Out
I’m going to hope that Shawn Yoakum and his brother aren’t very close, because this seems like it should have been extremely preventable otherwise. Shawn Yoakum tried to rob the Village Pantry at 900 N. 14th St. about 6 a.m. Tuesday, according to police. He failed, according to police reports. Yoakum pulled a knife and …
Moron Explains Moronic Act Moronically
Numbnuts from the plane A.K.A. James Potok has enlightened us as to why he thought it a good idea to announce to everyone that he had a virus and cause his flight to turn around and go home. And true to what appears to be form, he did it for the same reason that anyone …
Maybe We Should Send Him To China
I’m having one of those there oughta be a law moments after reading about this idiot. Seriously, everyone involved in this trip, from passengers to flight crew to ground workers all the way down to the people who laid the foundation for the factory where the plane was built should get to punch him. He …