Up, Up And Away In A Helium Balloon

Oh boy. Maybe the best thing that could happen to Lefkos Hajji would be to never find the $12000-ring intended for his fiance that he put in a helium balloon that was ripped from his hands by a gust of wind. If the accidental loss of a ring can make his wife to be so …

The Picture Of Stupidity

I’m confused. What law says you’re not allowed to snap a photo of under cover cops while they’re conducting a search warrant? If they’re under cover, there’s nothing to see. If there’s something to see, well I guess they blew their cover. But Randy Dean Sievert is being charged, and accused of violating his probation. …

Accuracy? What’s That?

If I’m a reporter, I would think the most important thing to do is to make sure I’m talking to the person I think I am. Ya know, if I’m supposed to be interviewing Hillary Rodham Clinton, I don’t accidentally interview Hillary Wicai Viers, communications director for another senator. But that’s exactly what John Goodall, …

Chris Benoit And Other People With Severe Brain Damage

Do you think Chris Benoit’s demotion to ECW led to his double-murder/suicide?  Top stars who ended up in ECW seemed to have treated the brand as an exit point from WWE, such as Kurt Angle and Big Show. Angle’s attitude backstage seemed to have gone down the toilet once he moved to ECW. Big Show …

I Guess She Had The Fucking Guts. It’s Me Who Lacks The Brain

We’ve all seen the scene on TV where someone has tried everything to persuade a suicidal person not to do it, and out of desperation, they try to snap them out of it. But if you’re going to try that in real life, for one, be sure you have things very much under control, and …

Let Them Bake Cake

Sure, these guys could have turned their lives around, but they’re gangster prisoners, you’re guards, and they just baked you a cake! Shouldn’t one of you have thought it was a bad idea to chow down? Guess not, since you’re all in the hospital being treated for mysterious symptoms. I’m just amazed that nobody took …

Season Until Slightly Stupid

A pair of bank robbers burst into tears and collapsed choking in Poland after they tried to use pepper spray on a cashier in front of an air conditioning unit. The wind blew the spray back over the pair, who staggered from the bank in the south-western city of Wroclaw empty handed. A local police …

Stop The Bus

I really need to stop being surprised every time the people entrusted with the job of running the world manage tobungle the simplest of tasks. The Municipal Railway will not use buses from its new hybrid fleet on one line that runs through the public housing projects in San Francisco’s Hunters Point neighborhood until officials …

Wrong Number, Big Mistake

Ya know, if you’re going to call a friend at midnight to announce that you killed all the bad guys in your videogame by saying “I have killed them all”,ya might wanna triple check that you’re dialing the right number, Especially if you’re Thomas Ballard, who has an outstanding warrant for his arrest. It wasn’t …