Don’t Hurt Yourself…ie

That title is awful. I know. It’s the best I had. Sometimes the perfect selfie is the one you don’t take. The one with you and the speeding train that’s headed right for you, for instance. The 21-second-long video was shared thousands of times on Facebook on Wednesday. In it, Mr Siva is seen standing …

Hope I Can cut This Lock Before They Lock Me Up

You know, I could really use a new bike. But man, they sure are pricey. Maybe I’d be better off stealing one. Like that one over there by the police station. It looks nice. https://www.facebook.com/GladstonePoliceDepartment/videos/2139232539724771/ A man was arrested last week after allegedly trying to steal a bicycle from in front of the Gladstone Police …

Save Money, Deliver Yourself To The Police Station

These stories almost aren’t weird anymore, but since I’m not sure we’re quite there yet… After police confronted him because it seemed an awful lot like he was about to leave a Walmart without paying for $125 worth of stuff that he had stashed in a backpack, 24-year-old Jeremy Roberts proved them right, taking off …

Thanks For The Ride. What Did You Say You Did For A Living? Uh-oh…

For all of the careful planning that can sometimes go into them, prison escapes themselves are necessarily a pretty rushed act. So although you almost can’t fault Allen Lewis for the way his turned out, he’s still worth pointing and laughing at because come on, man. Allen Lewis, 31, had run away when being moved …

Nice To Meet You, Bigfoot. I’m Smallbrain

Some doubts have been raised about whether or not this story is true even though two separate people have reported similar experiences, but to my ear it sounds completely believable. It’s equally believable that somebody would make it up for a few minutes of media fame, but for now let’s go with it. A Montana …

Take This Whiskey, Mr. President. It’s Great Whiskey. The Best Whiskey

I can’t say I fully understand the thought process here because Trump has said many times that he doesn’t drink, but the wife bit does make some sense. He has had three of them, after all. Clearly he knows something about the subject. Then again I’m sure being a pretend billionaire/successful businessman probably had a …

The Dork With The Barrett Tattoo

I read about this story 6 months or so ago and meant to write about it then. Since it still makes me chuckle whenever I think about it, I’ll write about it now. I heard about a guy who skipped parole and they were looking for him. When I saw Nathan Barrett’s description, my first …

If Life Gives You Lemons, Make Sure They Aren’t A Dish Soap Ingredient Before You Go Making That Lemonade

And now, a reminder that we can’t blame modern technology and cable news for all of the world’s ills because people have always been kind of dumb. In 1982, the Maryland Poison Center reported almost 80 cases of people who had suffered nausea and diarrhea after drinking Sunlight dishwashing liquid. They had received free bottles …