Good lord this is stupid. So the United States and I assume some other countries have security policies in place to prevent people from bringing dangerous bottles of water or tubes of lotion into airports or onto planes. I’ve never quite understood why, but that really doesn’t matter. It especially doesn’t matter now that I’ve …
Category Archives: that was dumb
Which Black Sock Goes With Which Black Sock .com
Would anybody care to enlighten me as to who the target market for this $190 batch of internet-connected socks is? Because I’ve got nothin’. That video is in what sounds like German, so if like me you can’t see what’s happening you’re not going to get a whole lot out of it. But there’s this, …
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What Are You Going To Do With The Money? I Think I’ll Buy A Samurai Sword
After I published my earlier post, I got to thinking about Colin Farmer. Farmer, you may recall, was the victim the last time we wrote about British police making a Taser-related oopsie. Yes, he was the blind fellow in his 60s walking to a pub using his white cane when he was attacked by an …
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It’s Ice Beer! I Have To Get To It Before It Warms Up!
I swear this has happened before, but since for the life of me I can neither remember when nor find reference to it, for now we must judge Michael Casteel and Michael Casteel alone for his poor choices. Running into a burning building in a frantic attempt to make a rescue is arguably a poor …
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Where Have All The Good Men Gone, And Where Are All The Dogs
You know, because I need a heroin. Depending on your worldview, Joseph Murphy has either had a really fun or really rough 2017. He kicked things off by getting arrested at a Disney hotel in Orlando, smashing his head into the police car partition, trying to choke himself, yelling “fuck Donald Trump” for some reason …
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Found One!
In case you thought distracted driving was one of those problems limited strictly to the youngsters and those damn phones they’ve got glued to their hands, 80-year-old Gregory Nayvelt is here to set you straight in fine fashion. Around 1:30 p.m. on Wednesday, Moore was driving a marked police 2015 Ford Explorer westbound on West …
As God As My Witness, I Thought Turkeys Looked Like My Brother
Lord, I hope this was somehow filmed by one of those game warden shows on Animal Planet that Carin and I like to interchangeably call Nature Cops. A hunter who believed he had taken down a pair of turkeys set out to find the birds, only to discover his brother and friend wounded on the …
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Fake Name, Real Fool
Today’s handy criminal tip: If you’re going to give a police officer a false name, maybe make sure you’re not still wearing the employee ID that has your real one on it. Police say 24-year-old Keyonna M. Waters was reportedly parked in a fire lane at the Liberty Plaza Shopping Center when an officer on …
It’s Me, Grandma. The Ghost Of Dumbshit Present
There are a lot of better ones, but on the surface at least, sending a fake obituary to the newspaper to throw the police off your trail maybe isn’t the absolute dirt worst idea in the world. but if you’re going to do that, you’re going to need to leave a contact number because the …
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If Only Our Heads Were As Loaded As Our Guns
I know some people don’t like it, but there’s a reason why the term gun nut exists. But since I’m a fair man, I’ll make you a deal. If you can come up with a better word than nut for someone who chooses to show his support for the second amendment by waltzing into a …
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