It’s safe to say that Ariel Sinclair didn’t think her cunning plan all the way through. The 23-year-old assistant Rite Aid manager apparently saw an opportunity when she realized that hey, I have access to this here lottery machine and can make it do whatever I want. According to investigators, what she wanted was to …
Category Archives: that was dumb
He Shoots, But If He Could Score He Wouldn’t Be Doing This Kind Of Thing
Ok seriously, what in the actual hell is going on here? Yesterday I mentioned the recent proliferation of tubesnake tales on the site, and woke up this morning thinking that maybe today would be a day where we could talk about something else for awhile. In an attempt to make that happen, I decided to …
Continue reading “He Shoots, But If He Could Score He Wouldn’t Be Doing This Kind Of Thing”
No Way, Jose
The story of Jose Angel Perales Is…I’m not even sure what it is. Gross? Yeah, let’s go with gross. According to a court complaint, Perales entered the lingerie store through an unlocked door around 4:10 AM. A police review of store surveillance video revealed that Perales–5’ 11” and 325 pounds–“walked around the store and shopped.” …
One Of These Days I Swear I’ll Figure Out How To Lose This Bet And Still Win It
As many questions as this story raises, I’m feeling pretty confident that it does answer at least one. I say this because there’s no way you’re reading it and not feeling like you’ve got a bit of a handle on why Brent Todd Friest’s 8-year-old son might have been visiting a psychologist. St. Paul police …
Continue reading “One Of These Days I Swear I’ll Figure Out How To Lose This Bet And Still Win It”
This iPad Is Broken. All That Comes Up On The Screen Is A Picture Of Some Idiot
You guys aren’t going to believe this. Yet another person bought an iPad from some dude at a gas station. And wonder of wonders, it wasn’t really an iPad. I know, it’s shocking! This $200 trunk bargain turned out to be a mirror dressed up like an iPad. Victim (I hate using that word in …
Continue reading “This iPad Is Broken. All That Comes Up On The Screen Is A Picture Of Some Idiot”
He’d Have Fought The Charges, But He Ran Out Of Things To Leave In The Places Where The Money Would Come From
More robbers than you’d think have made the mistake of filling out an application at a place they’ve held up, and plenty of them have written holdup notes on papers that have their names and addresses on them. But then there’s Troy F. Mitchell, who pulled off the rare feat of doing both in the …
Do You Ever Feel Already Buried Deep Six Feet Under? Scream But No One Seems To Hear A Thing. Do You Know That There’s Still A Chance For You…If You Just Rethink The Torch Idea
Remember when you were growing up and all those teachers and parents and grandparents kept telling you to live your life straight and narrow? The reason they kept saying that is because sometimes the alternative is dying widely scattered in all directions, and they wanted better for you. Two men were killed in an explosion …
If You Don’t Stop Walking Into The Knife I’m Flailing Around You’re Going To Get Me Arrested
Shadae Scott stabbed her boyfriend Kevin Wiggins multiple times with a pink pocket knife because she was upset that his dog had eaten her marijuana, or at least that’s what police and Wiggins would like you to believe. Scott, on the other hand, would prefer that you see things a little differently. there was no …
AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! You Got Disabled People In My Disability Court!
The story is a few months old and the issue has supposedly been fixed, but it’s worth a mention anyway just because it’s one of those things that happened. Plus the UK tag needs some love, and what says UK tag more than holding disability claim hearings on the 4th floor of a building, then …
Continue reading “AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! You Got Disabled People In My Disability Court!”
Before You Leave, Make Sure You Flush, I Know You Shouldn’t Be Here, But Don’t Be In A Rush
This is why your mom always told you to flush the toilet when you were done. Well ok, maybe not this specifically because I doubt your mom anticipated she’d be raising a criminal fool, but it would be pretty embarrassing to have your dumb ass hauled in for first-degree burglary because you didn’t listen to …