Nothing really amusing or horribly weird about this story, guy leaves kids in car while going into Wal-Mart. But what I do find really cute was the kids’ attempt to tell time. They were left in the car for the length of a Barney and Friends episode, but not as long as an episode of Sesame Street. Ah, kids who can’t tell time yet.
Oh My, We’re Doomed!
Yikes! Our world is going to hell when 9 third-graders plot to kill a teacher and mean business! The teacher told one of them not to stand on a chair, so she and some others started bringing a broken steak knife, handcuffs, duct tape, electrical and transparent tape, ribbons and a crystal paperweight to school so they could use them on the teacher. Uh, these kids need help real quick.
Just A Thought
Hmmm. If you’re willing to hurl glass objects at each other over who ate the last english muffin, ending in head wounds, maybe you shouldn’t be room-mates. Or maybe you should cut back on the booze.
Got Your Nose
Ug. I can’t imagine biting a pit bull on the nose to stop it from attacking your dog. Now the chick may have to get rabies treatments.
She’s Lucky He Got Home!
I agree that we shouldn’t be overprotective of children, but this is going too far the other way.
>We Are Gathered Here today To…Get This Creep Out Of Our Midst!
>Here’s a memorial service you’ll never forget. What the hell was up with this guy walking into an apartment where the mother of the deceased was holding a gathering to celebrate her daughter’s life, grabbing the deceased’s sister’s breast and then showing the mom nasty porn? There’s 0 explanation for why he would do that. Weirdo!
Putting The Ass In Gold Class
We established long ago that
movies and the theatre experience are for shit,
but that’s not stopping a group of investors from pouring $200 million into something called
Village Roadshow Gold Class Cinemas.
What exactly is a Village Roadshow Gold Class Cinema, you ask. Well for starters, it’s a place where a movie ticket will cost you $35. Yes, $35. My goodness you say. What grand luxuries am I afforded for this king’s ransom? Well, my good friend, I’m glad you asked, but I must warn you that upon finding the answer, you might just find yourself with shit in your pants.
Each complex will sport theaters featuring 40 reclining armchair seats with footrests, digital projection and the capability to screen 2-D and 3-D movies, as well as a lounge and bar serving cocktails and appetizers, a concierge service and valet parking.
But the circuit will especially push its culinary offerings — made-to-order meals like sushi and other theater-friendly foods from on-site chefs (a service button at each seat calls a waiter). Moviegoers will have to pay extra for any food they order, however.
Indeed, you again read that correctly. For your $35, you get to watch the same dreck as the common folk who paid $10, only you get to do so from the comfort of a nicer chair. You also receive the added benefit of having to tip a valet and a concierge, as well as the perks that come with ordering fancy snacks and drinks at what is sure to be a stunningly absurd mark-up. Oh to live the life of privilege.
So to answer your first question, a Village Roadshow Gold Class Cinema is what is sometimes known as a lesson in scale. You can pay $30 for a film and some snakcs, or you can pay $82,419 to watch that same film with others who have little respect for their money. But in the end, no matter which option you choose you’re stuck watching modern cinematic efforts, so it’s a no win at any price.
You Do, I Do, Everyone Everywhere Loves, The Spring
Did anyone else have to sing that little ditty for the music festival? Did anyone else wonder what a hey ding-a-ding was? Apologies for butchering the spelling, I can’t find the lyrics anywhere! I can’t remember if it had some kind of weird title, but typing in the few bits I remember from when I sang it at the music festival 17 years ago…jesus murphy! I have to let that sit for a minute. Ok. Anyway, typing in the words I remember into google returns diddly squat in the search results. But that wasn’t even the point of this post. The point is I love spring, and hope to Christ it’s here to stay!
Trixie and I just walked for a couple miles, and god did it feel good. The sidewalks were clear, except for the one right outside our apartment building, but it’s getting better. Trixie is such a little princess, she does not want to step in the big puddles. What a goofy pooch. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, the sidewalks were clear, oh it was awesome! You should have seen Trixie. She is so unbelievably cute. When she realized we were going for a real walk, she was so happy. She picked up the pace and just loved every minute of it. The first few times we were out and it was nice, she was distracted by everything. But she seems to have come back to her senses, and stays focused while she enjoys the beautiful weather. she’s also learned that we don’t have to cross the street as if we’re avoiding a snowbank on the other side because it exists no more, so we can go where we usually go. Man she’s an easy dog to work with. She’s such an amazingly fast learner. She even remembered where the cash registers were at this grocery store that we don’t go to a lot. Gotta love my Trixie doodles.
In the winter, an evil part of my mind said I won’t get out as much when the weather warms up because the novelty will have worn off and I’ll get lazy. That evil part couldn’t be more wrong. I’m already planning another big walk tomorrow. We’re gonna walk all the way downtown. That’s a mile and a half one way! God I love the spring! Bring on the awesome weather! I wanna soak up the sun and lose some weight! Who needs a gym when you’ve got a canine?
Holly Again
I know I sound a bit like a broken record, but here we go.
Remember Holly? Well, things have gotten a bit more urgent now. The tumour is growing and muffling sound, and threatening to snap the auditory nerve, the only thing between her and complete deafness. Picture a marble pressing down on a noodle of angelhair pasta. How long will it take before the angelhair noodle snaps? I remember playing with sheep’s brains in neuroscience, and oh my those nerves are thin. I remember snapping the spinal accessory while just trying to touch it.
There is no estimated time when her hearing will go. It could be months, it could be tomorrow. Please help, if you can.
To all those who have helped, it’s working. She has $6000 now. But she needs $60000. So let’s go! You can donate to her fund or buy raffle tickets, or you can buy a shirt. Hmmm the shirts. It would have been better if she had gotten shirts about her own cause instead of leftover shirts from her friend’s fund-raising endeavour, but I think her options are quite limited. So if you can help in any way, via donating or spreading the word, please do. If she goes deaf, she will be deaf and blind and raising a baby. I don’t mean to make it sound like I pity her, but if we can prevent her from having to adjust to total deafness after adjusting to total blindness, why not? The ability is there to save her hearing, she just can’t afford it. It’s kind of like dying of thirst and being too short to reach the water fountain. Let’s lift her up so she can take a drink!
Maybe You Don’t Need A Hard Hat Because You’re Hard-Headed
Grrr. This shit is what turns the public off of human rights lawsuits.
Mander Singh Sohal and Kalwant Singh Sahota are two Sikh men working in a sawmill in B.C. Now that the boss brought in an obligatory hard hat policy to lower injury risk, they’re suing, even though they’ve been offered a job for the same pay doing something that would not require a hard hat, calling this hard hat thing a human rights violation.
No, it’s to prevent your heads from becoming pulverized in an accident. Sure, you’ve worked for 20 years without one and haven’t had an accident or a claim, but all that says is you’re one lucky fucker. I could have j-walked for 20 years and not be hit by a bus. Still, j-walking is more risky than waiting for the little man who says “walk.” I could step out tomorrow and get clobbered because I chose to j-walk, a higher risk behaviour than crossing the street properly.
What really burns my butt is these guys were offered an alternative and they’re still on the happy road to human rightsville. They say that the alternative was only offered after they hit the media, which could be possible, but now that it is, take the damn thing! You got your fucking way, now be sensible and be done with it!
Listen, guys, you’re not helping your case. When people think of human rights violations and Sikhs, your case is going to be one of the ones that stands out and makes people even more resistent.