Of all the sites on the internet, this is one.
We haven’t had a good guy getting busted for having sex with something story in a while, so
here’s a Polish man who was fired from a building job at a children’s hospital after he was caught humping a vacuum cleaner.
Hopefully the justice system will work as it should, because if
our old buddy bicycle Bob has to be registered as a pervert
and this guy doesn’t, there’s something seriously wrong with the world.
Why on earth would you
What the hell? Had this man never cooked before? Well, I guess he’ll never cook again, and his kids will never be the same.
Wow. Gary Sinnott is a far more honest man than I. If I had a website that was similar to that of a naval base, and people were too stupid to verify where they were sending confidential emails, and the emails were getting to me, and I’d let the military know and they said “na, don’t worry about it,” I wouldn’t take the site down. I’d done my best to make sure they knew. Now I might get some interesting juice! But maybe I wouldn’t if it was actually happening. I just can’t believe the stupidity of the American military and the morons sending the emails.
Here’s a new kind of creepsake, only this one you don’t keep, you eat it. How would you like some German sausage made from the blood of military airmen?
Just imagine a girl dressed up in an evening gown taking out a knife and, as her talent, skinning a muskrat. Hey, if a girl wants to skin a muskrat and be a beauty queen, go ahead. Just the thought of the two together seems kinda creepy.
Yesterday, we had the radio on, and this song came on that left us scratching our heads. It was The Baby by Blake Shelton. It was the weirdest song. It was all about this kid having a pretty normal childhood, being a goof, but his mom loved him anyway, and then his mom died and he didn’t make it home in time, and boom! That’s it! The end was so abrupt that we were wondering if part of the song got amputated. We had to actually sit there and try and guess at what the message of the song was. Was it that he felt like he let her down because he didn’t make it home? That’s the only conclusion we could draw.
My explaining of how weird it was doesn’t do it justice. You have to hear it. Listen to the song and tell me if you get the same sense that it came to an abrupt, unexpected end. Maybe it’s because the song seemed to be a very meandering type of song and then it was just over. In any case, it was weird. Or maybe we’re the weirdos for thinking so much about a song.
Update: I don’t know if I’m feeling extra sappy, or whether I’ve grown to appreciate this song, but when I listened to it again, I actually cried a little bit. I’m getting older, I guess, and a few times in the last few years, there was a very real possibility that a parent might not make it. Thankfully, they’re still here, but it has made me think about what I would do if I got that call that said “get home as fast as you can because time is running short.” I can only get home as fast as transit can fly.
Who knew that a song that I thought was so pointless would make me think so much?
This one’s a bit old, but when has that ever stopped us before?
Charged with vehicular assault and obstructing a law enforcement officer after a crash last October is
Glen Alan Casebeer,
who went above and beyond the call of duty to ensure that his story was as funny as possible to folks like you and I by telling a police officer that he had “definitely had a few.”
Ok, who thought this idea would work? Can I zap them too?
In Wales, there’s a woman who can’t stop calling 999 and uttering fake bomb threats and such. Thelma Dennis often does this when she is drinking. So, after 60 convictions, they decide to try a weird therapy on her. They tape electrodes to her hands and make her dial 999 on a specially rigged phone. After dialing the third 9, she gets zapped and is screaming in pain. Quelle surprise, this therapy doesn’t work, and she makes another hoax 999 call.
Ok, geniuses, I think I know why this therapy doesn’t have a hope in hell of working. I’m sure she’s smart enough to know that as long as she’s not at the specially-rigged up phone with the electrodes on her hands, she’s not going to get zapped. Duh! Even an animal could make that connection. Wouldn’t it be more effective to order her to get help for her drinking problem?
I understand they’re desperate for a solution, but this one seems like the stupidest one possible, especially since it’s been stated that she is more likely to do this while drinking. Well then, isn’t that the key to solving the problem?
Every time I read this, I wonder more and more if the doctors treating her just decided to punish her for all the trouble she had caused rather than actually treating her.
Apparently, there’s a site where women who don’t think their boobs are big enough can go ask for donations so they can get implants. The men who give the money just want videos of the boobs in exchange. I’m not going to sit here and criticize the site, or the men who donate. If they want to throw money away so some chick can have bigger boobs, whatever. What I am going to make fun of is this woman. She actually thinks that the men want to…how does she put it? Ah. There it is.
Most of the men seemed to be more interested in making a personal connection and helping her out than just getting some racy images.
You go right on believing that, Karla-Rae Morris. You just go ahead.
What is it exactly about a monk slipping under a lawnmower that was in disrepair that keeps making me laugh? Is it the fact that that monk was the one responsible for the machine’s maintenance? Did he not repair it because he thought God would protect him if he slipped under it? Is it the fact that he’d already mangled his fingers in a lawnmower years earlier? Or is it the fact that it happened at the grounds of a peace temple? There was nothing peaceful about that day, especially not for the ones who found him…er, what was left of him. I know it’s tragic, but there’s something about the description of the accident that keeps making me think of that song “I’m looking over, my dead dog Rover, who I hit with a power mower.” Um yeah. I’m sick. People can feel free to hate me now.