Of all the sites on the internet, this is one.
Mark R. Hotuyec was arrested last week after being caught naked and masturbating while driving his van beside a school bus full of children from wait for it…wait for it…
Wood View Elementary School.
Well, they certainly got a pretty good one that day.
>Angela Nellany recently pled no contest to charges that she attempted to kill her husband Paul with a can full of wasps. Where did this story appear? That would be
The Modesto Bee,
of course.
My name is Steve, and I’m a wrestleholic. NO really, it’s true. I watch waaaaay waaaay too much of the stuff. I suppose that deep down I’ve always known it, but today I feel I finally have to face it once and for all.
This morning I woke up to the news that
Mats Sundin has decided not to waive his no-trade clause.
I’m not sure how to feel about that decision just yet. I can kind of see both sides. On the one hand Sundin is one of the best Leafs there has ever been and definitely one of the only guys this year to be a consistently good go to player. Besides, they put it in his contract and it’s his right to play where he wants to play. But on the other I can understand the desire to build for the future [especially given the season they’ve been having], and unloading somebody of his calibre would certainly be a pretty big move in that direction provided they make the right deal.
But back to homeboy’s wrestling addiction. I open my eyes, I turn on the news, I hear about Sundin. Almost immediately my mind starts screaming “THEY’RE WORKING YOU! IT’S A SWERVE! They’re putting this story out there to throw the media off the trail until a deal is done. Then they’ll announce it right at the deadline so it’ll be a huge story and a big surprise.”
Yes, in my brain Vince Russo is now booking the NHL.
But hey, what if I’m right? Stranger things have happened, and it’s not like this would be the first time somebody ever tried to pull something off without the press finding out.
Yeah, I’m probably nuts, but maybe not. Whatever the answer, I guess we’ll know tomorrow.
Someone asked a good question on my cellphone-using bus driver post that I thought needed to be answered up here. They wondered why I didn’t pull the bell myself. This is because when you’re blind, sometimes it’s hard to judge the distance and time and know if you’re really at the bus stop you think you are, and getting lost, especially in the cold, isn’t my favourite pastime. Some blinks are awesome at the whole knowing exactly where they are on a bus route thing , and have no problem pulling the bell at the right spot. I’m not one of those, so I prefer to sit at the front of the bus and ask to be let off at a certain stop.
Does that make sense? I hope it explains that whole thing to a few people who probably think I’m a lazy bastard for not pulling the bell.
Remember back when I mentioned a virtual haircut? Well, that particular barber has moved along, but you can find him here, along with some other oddities. What phantom words do you hear? Which phoneme is cut out by the cough? How do the scales play in your head? And what do you think of that song? The human brain is a wonderful thing.
Barb
tagged me with
the same wacky survey quiz thingie that Carin just did,
so here goes.
1. Put your iTunes, Winamp, Windows Media Player, etc. on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. You must write that song name down no matter how silly it sounds.
1. IF SOMEONE SAYS “YOU’RE HOT” YOU SAY?
Trench Town Rock
2. HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOUR LIFE?
Friend Of Mine
3. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE LONG GOAL?
Outside Now
4. WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
What’s Going On Here
5. WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
State Of The Union
6. WHAT DO YOU OFTEN THINK ABOUT?
What We’re All About
7. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON WHO LIKES YOU?
Sister Sally
8. WHAT DOES YOUR BEST FRIEND ALWAYS SAY TO YOU?
Pretty Vegas
9. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Out Of My Head
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SAYING?
Greensleeves
11. WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Starbucks Sucks
12. WHAT WILL BE PLAYED AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Tear It Up
13. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR?
Rocky Mountain Way
14. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Live Again (The Fall Of Man)
15. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR HOUSE?
I’ll Stick Around
16. WHAT WILL YOU NAME THIS POST?
Strokin’
Well, considering half the searches we get in our stats, that title’s actually pretty fitting.
Don’t think I really learned anything about myself, but it was a neat way to waste a couple minutes.
Barb M wants me to do this, so off I go. I expect this will heartily suck, but who knows? Maybe it will be hillarious.
1. Put your iTunes, Winamp, Windows Media Player, etc. on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. You must write that song name down no matter how silly it sounds.
1. IF SOMEONE SAYS “YOU’RE HOT” YOU SAY?
Eat my brain.
2. HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOUR LIFE?
Superman
3. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE LONG GOAL?
good mother
4. WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Shaggy goes shopping
5. WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Golden Slumbers
6. WHAT DO YOU OFTEN THINK ABOUT?
te quitter
7. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON WHO LIKES YOU?
Soft Wars: The Microsoft Empire
8. WHAT DOES YOUR BEST FRIEND ALWAYS SAY TO YOU?
Dog
9. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
I Think I’m A Clone Now
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SAYING?
STP
11. WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Sunday Bloody Sunday
12. WHAT WILL BE PLAYED AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Crossroads
13. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR?
I Missed The Bus
14. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Date Rape
15. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR HOUSE?
Undone
16. WHAT WILL YOU NAME THIS POST?
My Doorbell
I’m amazed I didn’t have mor French titles in there. There were some lame ones, but some pretty funny ones, and no, I’m not keeping some date rape secret. I had to say that in case someone got all disturbed or something.
Now boys and girls, I want you to say hello to your new classmate Brfxxccxxmnpcccclllmmnprxvclmnckssqlbb11116. You can call him /ˈalˌbin/ if you must.
I’m endlessly fascinated when odd things that you’d think would be impossible to steal get stolen. Things like rollercoasters, beaches or in the most recent case a 4 tonne railway bridge.
The article is hilarious too, written pretty much exactly how I would have written it.
The company which was responsible for looking after the bridge raised the alarm when, ever alert, they noticed that the bridge wasn’t there any more.
Martina Hruskova, a spokeswoman for the Czech police, commented to AFP: ‘We are not sure if it was taken for personal use or for its scrap value.’ Exactly what that ‘personal use’ might be was left unsaid.
I’m also a big fan of the term “light-fingered bridge enthusiast.”
And yes, as has been the case every single goddamn time I see one of these stories, there are no suspects and there have been no arrests.
I never noticed them saying in this article that along with the brain-reading headset, there is a backup controler that uses the old-fashioned hands, because I think you’d need it.
There is no way some game developer has managed to master the reading of thoughts when we can’t seem to create devices to do this for people who can’t move their arms and legs. There just isn’t. psychology and nurology have been trying to pin down what neurons cause what movement and what ones are in control of thoughts for years! How did this developer figure all of this out so fast?
And what sensors are reading thoughts? Last time I checked, we needed to have electrodes at least stuck to a person’s head to measure brain activity. Does the player actually have to stick electrodes to his head like he’s having an EEG to play?
If it really does work, I cannot even begin to imagine the frustration level a player would have. I think too many things at once, not all of which are about the game I’m playing. I don’t think I’m single-minded enough to be able to direct all my thoughts at the game. Would I think about food and my character would try to eat the wall? Would I wonder idly what was on TV, think about swimming I saw the other day, and my character would jump in the water?
And what’s with it sensing if you’re angry or tense. If you’re too angry, does the game shut down?
I really have a hard time believing that this thing even works. If it does, how about we put it to use helping people who can’t move their extremities for one reason or another? Let’s help them move before we start making Pacman run across a screen.