I shouldn’t be laughing at this, and I feel like a horrible person for laughing, but I am. What is so funny about a guy all ready to go set off a suicide bomb falling down some stairs and setting it off too soon? I don’t know, but I can’t stop laughing. And then I mentally slap myself for laughing. And the funniest part is this guy isn’t the first to blow himself up as he gets ready to blow himself up.
Now the Legislators Of Iowa Definitely Need Prayer
Man, people are narrow-minded. The Iowa legislature had its usual prayer at the opening of the session, only this time, it was said by a muslim Imam, and because of that, people are getting all bent out of shape over some words. They claim that it wasn’t a prayer, but some kind of political statement with terrorist leanings. They say this because he mentions the great Satan and victory over those who disbelieve.
Here’s the text of the prayer, or as close to it as I can get, as shown in the article.
Imam Muhammad Khan of the Islamic Center of Des Moines spoke first in Arabic.
“I seek refuge in God against the accursed Satan in the name of God, most gracious, most merciful,” Khan said in English. Khan made no specific mention of the war in Iraq or foreign affairs, but he called God the “master of the day of judgment” and asked for “victory over those who disbelieve.”
“As we begin this new year…in a world with trials and tribulations, we ask you to open the hearts of our legislators and policy makers to make the right decisions for the people of Iowa,” Khan said. “…We ask that you guide our legislators and give them the wisdom and knowledge to tackle the difficult problems that face us today in order to eliminate the senseless crimes on humanity. Help them, Lord, to solve the complicated problems in the State of Iowa so that we can be a model to the world.”
Khan’s prayer lasted about four minutes and he closed with a few words for legislators.
“On behalf of the Muslim community of Des Moines and Iowa, I wish you all the success in this year for making the right decisions for us.”
Ok, can you see anything wrong with that? That sounded like your run of the mill prayer to me. Now let’s break it down. First of all, his word was the “accursed satan”, and doesn’t every prayer ask for protection against the resident evil in that religion? And with regards to the whole victory over those who disbelieve thing, how do we know he was referring to Americans and other folks? Every religion calls people who don’t believe a whole host of names, and prays for victory of those who do. How is this any different?
Man, people are twitchy, and I feel sorry for the Imam and the guy who invited him, because I think he was doomed from the beginning. I think if the guy said he liked soup, they would have tried to jump to conclusions about what soup may have symbolized in terrorist talk. How sad.
Rabies Outbreak
Wow, what a mess. Let’s start at the beginning. On a farm near Newton, a dog gave birth to some pups. She was not vaccinated against rabies. She then killed a rabid skunk, and ta da, we have the beginnings of a situation.
It’s no surprise that her pups got rabies. They’re nursing, licking their mother and doing all those little puppy things. Then, the family sold them to a puppy broker in Chesley who calls itself Feed Me More Pets. The broker didn’t bother to ask if the pups’ mother had been vaccinated. I know the puppies themselves are too young to get any shots, but the mother certainly isn’t, and doesn’t any respectable and responsible person selling puppies want to know sort of where they came from?
They took the puppies, along with other puppies, to Dr. Flea’s Flea Market and sold them. Ta da! Now we have a true situation. All those pups probably have rabies, since it spreads between animals really easily, and anyone who played with them could have it too.
Weirdly enough, I’m simultaneously angry and thankful for the stupidity of one family, mostly angry. They bought a puppy from this booth because their little boy had been asking for a puppy since Christmas. They saw the price and got all excited and took the plunge! It’s families like these that piss me off. If you’re going to buy an animal, make it a responsible decision, think long and hard, and don’t just get it because the kid has been asking for one. You’re taking care of another life. Have the decency to give it some thought. When I used to live out in the country, I would see a lot of these abandoned pets. Once they weren’t cute anymore, they were just dumped off to fend for themselves. The main thoughts were “they’re animals, they were meant to be in the wild…” or “Somebody will take them in.” In response to the first thought, if an animal is raised in captivity, they lose a lot of those wild instincts, and they won’t survive. They certainly won’t survive an encounter with real wild animals. In response to the second thought, yeah, way to take responsibility.
Anyway, shortly after getting the puppy, it got sick. They took it to the vet and found out the treatment was going to be too much money. Arg! If you’re going to buy a puppy, at least expect some outlay of cash! It isn’t all fun and games. I guess I can’t truly understand until I hear how much the price tag was, but judging by their approach to getting the puppy, it might not have been that much.
So, because the vet bills were too high, they dumped the puppy off at the Humane Society, where it bit a worker, died, and was found to have rabies. The worker has started rabies treatments and they think he will be fine.
Now here’s the part where I say why I’m thankful for their stupidity. At least they didn’t abandon it somewhere, so it could run around spreading rabies even more, or try to keep it, and not tell anyone until it died and who knows who was infected. At least they took it to the humane society. Then, the word could start getting around so other people can get treated and hopefully all the dogs can be found.
As of now, 2 dogs have died from Rabies, and four others have been quarantined, but there are 6 other puppies running around who could potentially start to show signs. There is a hotline people can call to let Public Health know if they came into contact with a rabid dog, and find out what to do. There are going to be a lot of people getting treated for rabies.
As I write about this, I’m amazed this sort of thing doesn’t happen more often. I don’t think a lot of pet stores ask if the mothers of pups have been vaccinated etc. There are lots of people who give away or sell puppies at their homes. When I was a kid, we got our first dog that I can remember this way. But I guess most people vaccinate their dogs so they don’t get Rabies. What a scary thought, and what a pile of chaos this has created.
The Wheels On the Bus Go…Something Something Something
Stagecoach has put together a book of instructions for people who have forgotten how to catch and use busses because they’ve spent so much time using their cars.
Since adequate words to describe the sheer stupidity at work here are currently eluding me, here’s a small sample of the helpful tidbits found within.
The guide begins reassuringly with: “Using the bus could not be easier.”
Passengers should “first of all decide on what bus you need” and once the right bus has been spotted, with the “number and destination on the front”, one should then “signal for the driver to stop”.
The guide continues: “Wait until the bus is stopped and the doors are fully opened and step on board.
“When you want to get off, press the bell once. For your safety we recommend you remain seated until the bus has arrived at the stop.”
Just…wow.
When asked to comment on the book, company spokesman Steven Stewart had this to say:
“Our guide is not designed to be patronising, it’s just answering questions that cause fear and uncertainty when people are thinking of getting a bus.”
I don’t know about the rest of you, but the only fear and uncertainty I’m feeling right now is over the realization that not only did somebody think the world needed a book like this, but there are people roaming loose among us who will probably find it useful.
Ever Heard The Term "Don’t Judge A Book By Its Cover?"
Ug. I have few words for this story, only that people can’t read, or think anymore.
If you saw a book with a picture of a family on the cover, with the following words below it:
“A Family Affair: BTC is the perfect fit for the White family.” what would you think? would it be….
a. The family’s last name is White. Ya know, the White family, like the Smith family, or the Jones family.
or…
B. That’s a little weird, but more reading is in order before jumping to conclusions.
or…
c. you should be offended at this display of racism and call and write immediately.
It’s sad, because apparently, a lot of people decided to go with choice C. Guess what? It was about the family of James and Casey White, and if these outraged readers had managed to read 3 pages into the book, they would have discovered that.
Now, the school is tripping all over itself and feeling all bad. Come on! We’re talking about a school! What a perfect opportunity for them to teach people to read and think! Why should they cave and start apologizing? They did nothing wrong. They should stand up, say so, and make the people who got all mad look like the idiots they are.
Maybe They Should Steal Some Brains
Attention car thieves: If you’re stealing a car to get to your anti-car theft counselling sessions, it’s time to go to jail, boys. I don’t understand why these kids were getting counselling if they’re the worst offenders in the car theft department you can find. And that story about it being too cold to walk? Give me a break. But in case they didn’t know, here’s a message for them. You know there are these numbers you can call where you can ask someone to come and pick you up and take you somewhere. They’re called taxi services. Use one. Oh, you knew about that? I thought so.
I still can’t believe that some people are considered so high-risk that they are called once every 3 hours to make sure they’re not stealing cars. Is this all day and all night? If so, I hope they live alone, because I wouldn’t want to be awakened in the night for the check-in call. Ok, if you need to check on them every three hours, lock them up!
The Lights Are On, But Nobody Has A Home
Hmmm. Even though the house is in ruins, what do you wanna bet the bugs are still alive?
Lions And Tigers And Bears, Oh My!
Here’s reason no. 2708396 why we shouldn’t deal with China. Look at their zoos! Yeah, this looks like a country who should be hosting the olympics. Be glad you’re not a goat or a chicken in China.
>Give The Gift Of Drug Company Trinkets
>Ok, let me get this straight. an operator of several hospitals and clinics in Minnesota has decided to get rid of all the trinkets that have been given to doctors from drug companies. They say it’s a conflict of interest. Great! I understand. But here’s where I get confused. They’re going to send them to Cameroon! How are a bunch of pens, notepads, mugs and other assorted crap with names of drugs written on them going to help people in Cameroon? It’s not like they’re selling them and giving the money to Cameroon. They just make it sound like they’re going to put the 20 shopping carts’ worth of stuff on a plane to Cameroon and send it on its way.
Hey, I’m glad they’re trying to find a use for all that junk, but…will the stuff be of any use?
Seek And We Shall Find
We’ve been noticing a lot of people on live search looking for a certain drunken bus fight on the vomit comet, the bus in Toronto where Matt got the name for our blog. Some of them mentioned YouTube. So, since everybody’s looking for it, here it is. Did I get the right fight?
Next time, if you’re looking for a YouTube video, try going to YouTube to find it. You’ll have much better results.